ENG 202

Blogging Memoirs

2005-12-08T12:55:00.000-05:00

As I look over the blogs of the last few months I am surprised at how negative most of them are. Most of them are haughty and condescending with a touch of sarcasm sprinkled in for good measure. I guess I misplaced my rose colored sun glasses before blogging. I do think I came up with some "magical" moments, though, and it taught me more about writing to an audience, knowing that my fellow students would be reading it. I wasn't always comfortable with writing my blogs, but I think it's important to be out of your comfort zone sometimes. The best wines are made when the vine struggles; the vine will produce fewer grapes, but those grapes will be the sweetest. Here's to a good year!

He's laughing at us

2005-12-05T21:33:00.000-05:00

There's one recurring issue that leads me to believe that there is some greater power - a big guy in the sky - and he's laughing at us. I'm sure you all know well the ever pleasant phenomena of the stress sickness. It's the "I have no time to get sick right now because I have a million things to do so naturally I'm going to come down with the plague" sickness. I do have some time in my life that could easily be designated as sickness time - time when I have nothing better to do than lay in bed and cough and sneeze and wheeze. But this is not when I get sick - it would be too easy! No. Instead I get sick right before finals when I have three ten page papers to write and my family coming into town demanding attention. So now, my pocketbook is a Kleenex box, the sun - as it's a sneeze instigator - is my enemy, and I almost left the house with my bathrobe on this morning. What other explanation is there other than the presence of some sick minded higher being?

Driving...

2005-11-22T11:01:00.000-05:00

Here we go...twelve hour drive to Michigan starting momentarily. I suppose if I have any doubts about wether or not my marriage will last, driving for twelve hours to spend four days with the in-laws should make things clear. As always, being the food junkie that I am, I am very concerned with packing enough food for the trip. The last time we drove out we didn't pack any food and were stuck in fast food hell for the whole day. This trip should be even more interesting because it's the first time visitng his family since we got engaged. The moment of truth. Were they all just pretending to like me because they assumed I'd go away eventually, or are they really happy to be inheriting me into their family? Did I mention we're going to my fiance's ten year high school reunion? It's like torture in vacation form...I'll let you know how it goes...

Maybe procrastination is good?!

2005-11-10T14:26:00.000-05:00

I used to be a procrastinator - big time. I left everything until the last minute and scrambled like a mad-woman. Having learned my lesson, I have now traveled so far away from procrastination that it may actually be detrimental. I like to plan out the whole semester early on - seriously, I'm one step away from color coding my underwear to alert me of assignment due dates. I am so used to doing everything ahead of time now that when things are thrust upon me last minute, I just kind of stand there, deer in the headlights, looking frantic, and am unable to produce anything. In the event of a disaster, it should be easy to find me; I'll be the one huddled in the corner with my planner checking frantically for any prior notice of the events. I suppose in the grand scheme of life you can't really plan everything with underwear color coding, so maybe It serves us better to procrastinate. I'm not quite ready to give it all up, but maybe I could start by actually taking a day off from school work, and maybe, if all goes well, I would even consider taking a break from the hermit life and socializing....baby steps....

Globalization symposium

2005-11-04T17:03:00.000-05:00

Wow! This globalization symposium has been so thought provoking and exciting. I feel so honored that so many amazing people form all over the world were willing to come and speak at our tiny little College. Amazing. Totally inspring. I feel like I could write a book but it would be nowhere near as good as the books written by these speakers. The most provocative thus far has been Vandana Shiva who's latest book, "Earth Democracy" sounds absolutely amazing from the small passage she read to us. Don't you ever wish you could just be a student forever? I feel like I could do hundreds of graduate degrees based on what I've heard, and am very diappointed to have to choose just one - at least for now....

Truckers unite!

2005-10-31T20:48:00.000-05:00

A survey of millionaires in America revealed that very few of them had ever attended college, and almost none of them had attended graduate school. Contrary to popular belief, professions like lawyers and doctors have a fairly low rate of millionaires. This is for two reasons: 1) they spend so much time and money on school, and once they are out even their high pay can't always make up for the time spent not earning money and the huge school loan debt they have incurred 2)professionals like doctors and lawyers are forced to look the part (buy the big house, drive the nice car, wear the expensive clothes) and this is incredibly draining on a salary, no matter how large. Who knew that the most likely business of millionaires is the trucking industry? So, my advice to all of you looking to hit it big: drop out of school and get a CDL license, it's a hell of a lot easier and more effective.

Like Riding a Bike....

2005-10-21T13:09:00.000-04:00

I was a very serious ballerina for the first fifteen years of my life, then an injury took me away from it for the next seven. I knew it would not be easy to get back into it; as anyone who has ever taken ballet can tell you, no physical activities work the muscle groups you use in ballet. You can work out every day and still be a quaking mess the first day back to classes if you've been away for long enough. I've been back for a month now, and everyday someone tells me that it's 'just like riding a bike'. The idea of coming back to ballet being just like riding a bike is lauphable. Ballet is different for two reasons: 1)the muscles you use to ride a bike get worked out everyday as you walk and climb stairs; therefore your body is not entirely out of shape when you get back on a bike; 2) ballet is much more mentally challenging than riding a bike! You need to be able to remember combinations while telling your body to pull up here and turn out there, and it's exhausting mentally, nevermind physically. The funniest part of being back is trying to do something that I could have done with my eyes closed eight years ago when I was studying with the Rock School of Pennsylvania Ballet. This time, when I try it again, my brain knows what to do, and synapses fire and send the command, and my body replies with this strange herky jerky movement that is nothing like the command I gave. So I guess going back to ballet is more like riding a bike after you've been bed ridden for two years and your muscles have atrophed so bad that just putting a leg over the bike is as far as you can get on day one. I just completed day four and am finally able to start pedalling, although not very gracefully, and I look forward to making it to a quick ride around the block by next year.

KSC Library's Viscous Circle

2005-10-16T15:48:00.000-04:00

I know this seems a bit ridiculous, but I am deeply offended by the library's weekend hours. The library closes at 8:00 on Friday and Saturday nights and doesn't open until 1:00 on Sundays. Maybe I'm the only one who would be in the library late at night on the weekends or early on Sunday morning, but I can't help but feel that this is a cycle they are creating. I'm sure the reason they are not open is because not enough people go to the library late at night; however, maybe if they were open more people would feel inclined to go. Rather than catering to the party-going populous of the school, perhaps they should be encouraging the studious populous. Maybe I'm just a nerd, but it seems like the school is forcing students not to be nerds by keeping them out of the library on weekend nights. Liberate the nerds!

Flooding

2005-10-11T11:31:00.000-04:00

It was amazing to see how the flooding of this past weekend was reported on the news. It seemed like every station was covering flooding in Keene. Keene did have flood waters, but really the worst that happened were some people being evacuated and a bunch of basements flooding. The real disaster took place in Alstead along the Cold River. Whole houses came down and took out bridges, the river increased its girth and my parents had about 20 to 30 feet of property that was alongside the river and is now a part of the river. Two small cabins got taken by the river that flowed though their land in the worst of the flooding and only a portion of the roof of one of them remains. Our neighbors car that was onced parked in her driveway was flooded when the river increased its girth and is now buried in river sediment up to the roof. We found a kayak, tons of tires, and an old propane tank that got caught in the fallen trees of my parents property when the river ran through. I'm sorry, but in comparison to what happened to people along the cold river; Keene is doing just fine and the National Guard would be better serving if they left Keene and headed to Alstead where they still don't have power or phone service and are missing a substantial amount of buildings and homes, as well as people, from the flooding.

What's with the twitch?

2005-09-30T15:55:00.000-04:00

We all know we do it, and if you sleep next to someone who falls asleep before you, you know all about it. It's that one last jerk your body makes right before you fall asleep. For some it's a full body lurch, others just get a little leg jerk, and the very special few get a nearly inaudible whimper or groan to accompany this already graceful moment in your day. So what is it? It's like our bodies are fighting the act of sleep and this is the last stitch effort to keep you awake. Sometimes my boyfriend's late night lurch is so big it wakes me up - kind of a "waking by osmosis" kind of a deal where the intended target is so deeply exhausted that it is transferred to an innocent bystander - namely, me. This phenomena deeply puzzles me; why do our bodies not want us to fall asleep? I had a roommate a few years back who lived by the mantra:"you'll get all the sleep you need when you're dead", although for him it was more an excuse to drink heavily, but nevertheless he may have been on to something. What if we are sleeping our lives away? With such a limited amount of time on this planet it would seem wastefull to spend so much of it sleeping and maybe our late night lurch is trying to wake us up (no pun intended) to the fact that we're sleeping away our precious time. Maybe it's all an illusion; maybe we could just stay awake and sleep once a week or something - I'm sure we'd all get a lot more done.

Why is technology ugly to Americans?

2005-09-26T21:58:00.000-04:00

I have recently been confronted with the fact that Americans think technology is ugly. Who wouldn't, right? We think power stations, electrical wires, cell towers... but what about wind turbines? Do Americans hate wind turbines because they associate them with these "ugly" technologies? And what about anti-wind farm environmentalists? Are we fighting for a cleaner environment or a more "untouched" environment? Society is never going to stop consuming. There will not be a change of heart where white suburbia suddenly wakes up and realizes they don't need SUVs to grocery shop....So, we need energy. What's wrong with a wind farm? Would you rather see smoke stacks? Why can't we as a society take a technology for what it accomplishes not for the speck it creates on the horizon? I personally think it's a beautiful, progressive, clean, and hopefull speck. Why doesn't everyone else?

Why do people go to college?

2005-09-19T21:51:00.000-04:00

You will hear people ask why students choose Keene State over other college options, but rarely do you hear the stripped down version. Especially here at Keene State, you see people here solely for the social aspect of college life, one step into the noisy library can tell you that. Maybe I have a distorted view but I can't see spending $5,000 a semester to meet new people. If you think of college as an investment in yourself, in your mind's future capabilities, then you would be hard pressed to find justification for keg parties.
Why is college used as a forum for young adults to socialize? Haven't we spent nearly all years leading up to our college experience learning how to relate to others in our environment? Futhermore, wouldn't traveling and exposure to people outside our immediate environment be more beneficial than meeting people on a campus with such little diversity? Does socializing have to be a part of the college experience? Are our scholars anti-social and our socialites lacking in scholastics? Must scholastics and keg parties be mutually exclusive?

Is the Wind getting stronger?

2005-09-13T13:11:00.000-04:00

Currently, it is more cost effective (excluding externalities) to produce energy using fossil fuels than with wind, solar, or biomass production. What will happen to this proportion, however, as oil prices continue to rise? If you are not convinced that we should invest in renewable energy for the sake of keeping our planet healthy, would you be convinced if it were more economically viable to produce renewable energy? Wind energy is expensive to install but getting cheaper, and has very little input costs after installation, making it an economically viable option in future power generation. Investing in renewable technologies now will make them cheaper later, and in order to secure our future energy prospects, instead of occupying Iraq, we should be investing in wind technology.

Wind turbine technology is one of the fastest growing technologies of our time, and every country but the U.S. seems to have grasped this. The U.S. generates less than 1% of our electricity with wind power. Germany has a higher installed generating capacity than the U.S. and they are about the size of Texas with far less wind prospects than we have within our borders. It is not the lack of opportunity for wind farms that holds us back, it is the lack of support and funding. Countries like Denmark are producing 25% of their energy using wind power and their investment in wind technology is the third biggest contributor to their economy.
The U.S. advocates using agricultural subsidies to protect our farming interests when the economic laws of 'comparative advantage' would have us do otherwise, yet we use these same economic principles to justify not investing in wind technology. With rising oil prices, and lowering costs of wind farm installation, how long do we have until the two meet, and must we wait until then to do something about our dismal energy portfolio?

Naked Thoughts

2005-09-13T11:10:00.000-04:00

The unfortunate thing about a writing class is that it forces us to write. I much prefer to let my ideas simmer before putting them on display, but a deadline forces our incomplete thoughts onto paper before we are ready to let them go. Putting ideas on paper is a big commitment; once an idea leaves your head and hits the paper it represents your thoughts, feelings, or knowledge and serves as a marker of your place in this world at this particular juncture. I prefer to get dressed before going outdoors and somehow this premature writing leaves me feeling naked and exposed. But perhaps we need to see our writing naked in order to get at the real driving force of our ideas. As writers, we fix up our thoughts with fancy words, and clever phrases, but maybe it is better to do all this consciously in a more structured environment than our minds in order to test the validity of our thoughts. Our minds will trick us into believing a half truth, but words on paper can't hide behind a shaky facade. Perhaps we need to test our naked thoughts in the harsh reality of print to identify the path we are already taking, and clarify our intentions on this path.

The world wide blogger

2005-09-06T12:56:00.000-04:00

It's interesteing that so many people have decided to spend time writing blogs and on such varied subjects. It's great to hear someone else's perspective and you often get suckered in when you least expect it.
http://www.inkmuse.com/imblog/ has a discussion about the new term 'ginormous' what I loved about this is that I was introduced to the word by the movie Elf, and have taken to using it quite a bit myself.
http://suzannagig.journalspace.com/ is not what I would typically read but I stumbled upon it and I enjoy the way she writes. I've always been fascinated by the different paths one can take to tell the same story and how differently it is inturn interpreted because of these literary choices.
http://pinkofeministhellcat.typepad.com/ this one is great because I myself am quite a leftist. This is the kind of site that 'big brother' is watching...beware - you've made the security threat list....

Advice

2005-09-05T07:31:00.000-04:00

Perhaps it's my small stature, or the fact that at 22 I still get carded at rated R movies, or perhaps it is simply because I am only 22. Whatever the reason, I seem to be a magnet for advice. Maybe, unknowingly, I am walking around with a huge sign on my forehead that reads, "Help! I have no idea how to navigate my way through this world and without your guidance I'm lost!". Now don't get me wrong, advice given from a credible source is invaluable and I truly do respect it - this is not the advice we're talking about here.

As anyone who has ever worked in the service industry can attest, working as a bartender is probably the worst job for unwarranted advice. I was a bartender in Harvard Square in Cambridge for a year, and had lengthy conversations with some of the most accomplished and brilliant people around; just ask them - they'll tell you how smart they are! Something happens around the third or fourth scotch that lures people into this false sense of familiarity with their bartender, and they just can't help but get entrenched in the details of their life. This is where the horrible advice comes in - and I've had it all.

One of my all-time favorites was the marital advice from the divorced man. He was incredibly successful and told me I shouldn't worry about being there for my significant other. "It's more important to attend to your career needs first, don't make compromises - that's what I did and look at where I am now!" So of course I in turn ask, "where are you now?" and he replies, "divorced with two kids and totally alone, but very rich!" This is where I learned that it is always important to find out the end result of the advice given, before giving it too much weight.

I just recently came back to school after four years of working for a living, and have found that blending in with the college students has opened me up to a whole new world of advice. Advice on what law school I should choose and why from a single man with no children who never went to college, for instance. I may look like a college freshman who's never held a job and just moved out of her parents house, but in reality I have been living on my own, financially independent of my parents since I was 16, and my first home away from home was a cooperative house with 6 professionals in their thirties where I got my fill of unsolicited advice.

I know that others' experiences can teach us what to do or what not to do depending on the situation, and are therefore not useless information, but I can only hear it so many times before I start going a little mad. What makes people so sure that what they have to say and what they've experienced will be usefull to me? Or that in the thirty minutes of interaction we've had, I have grown to trust and value their opinions? Furthermore, who says that my experience will produce the same result even if I do follow their advice? Do we ever reach an age that we stop getting useless advice, or am I doomed to sift through all the bad advice in search of a few gems here and there for the rest of my life?

I welcome any comments that mirror my same frustrations as I know that college students never run short on advice from others, but please, for my own sanity, I don't need more advice!

fear

2005-09-01T12:41:00.000-04:00

On the subject of fear, one often remembers the words, "there is nothing to fear but fear itself". This statement puzzles the scientific side of my brain. In the wild, fear is an asset to prey animals because it instinctively leads to better physical and mental performance than would otherwise be seen in its absence. Humans, however, have this innate ability to allow fear to be overwhelming, controlling, unmotivating, and paralyzing. Where in evolution did we lose the ability to respond effectively to fear? Perhaps fear is so removed from everyday life that it is only known through virtual mediums and urban myths. In the wild, a fear realized means death. Our fears as humans are not for our lives, but for our livelihoods. Perhaps it is not the presence of fear that should be fearful, but the severity of it. If our fears were as valid as we see them to be, would we not be instinctively equipped with the tools to defend ourselves?

2005-09-01T12:27:00.000-04:00

Welcome to my blog!